after such a horrible week, i went to church abit apprehensively on sunday... just didn't know how to face God and to keep this facade on... was quite painful throughout service to stay focused =| later during altar call, i finally took the big step - i laid my problems at the foot of the cross for Him to sort it out... its still gonna be hard and and its still gonna hurt but i can rest assured that my hurts will not be in vain and that He has a purpose for everything in His time...

The river runs and the river hides
Out to the ocean and under the sky
I promise you, the answer will come
Hold on to patience and watch for the sign
Everything in its time

'cause maybe there's another plan
One I still can't see
A little surprise, like your love in my life
Funny how time changes how we see
~ "Corrinne Mays - Everything in its Time"

just knowing all this and actually believing it is a totally different experience altogether... and i'm just glad that i've taken yet another step closer to Him and i pray He'll continue to strengthen me and to reach out and grant me the power to reach for Him... thanks to all the people that prayed for me... i love you all =) i really do... and i know that your love for me has been a tremendous encouragement through this difficult period =)

on to today's program... was woken up from my sleep by sound of thunder and of rain pattering on the window... bleary eyed i picked up my fone and read felix's message "haa... raining here" i was too dazed to reply my usual "dedication doesn't stop for the weather" =P by the time i reached macritchie the weather had cleared and the sun was out in full force... bah... macritchie was SUPER packed today *grumble* forgot it was youth day and all the secondary schools/jcs were making use of this extra day off to train for the upcoming national schools... hai... last minute attempts =P okaez, but i shouldn't be so quick to judge... remember when i did national schools the stupid nyjc coach laughed at our 'last minute attempts" as well... at least our last minute attempts earned us a gold medal while none of his charges came even close =P

got stabbed this morning by the stupid rack when i accidentally walked into it trying not to trip over some seats lying on the floor -.-" ... but well, at least they're all padded up properly now and we don't hafta worry about our boats getting scratched anymore =) not in the near future aniwaez... unless people return the boats to the rack too violently or something... paddle lodge was locked so i thought we'd hafta paddle T1 over 1000m today (scary scary thought - lugging that big heavy boat over 1000m =P) but luckily one of the SCF coaches recognised andrea and the national team paddlers were able to borrow boats from SCF! =) was quite a sight - seeing 9 K1s out in the water today =D haha... felt quite shiok... especially during the 30s sets... haha to have everyone cheonging at the same time! haha... but yah, today's program was quite short... didn't really feel that tired hmm... and training intensity is supposed to step up this 2 weeks... think will hafta replan the next few sessions...

managed to get everyone to sign up for the NDP relay! =) actually think it will be quite fun... haha, will get a sense of that patriotism again =P yupz, instead of nua-ing at home we'll actually be a part of the celebrations! =) and instead of going out and gorging ourselves, the team will be actually going out and engaging in a healthier activity this time round! =P hahaha...

okaez, need to go... tomorrow's program will be quite painful i think... need rest =P